I Am Diabetic

I had been planning to do this essay about being diabetic, but hadn't had time to set up and shoot the photos. In response to Tech's comment on my bread-making post, however, I've gone ahead and gotten it together.
Tech's post about diabetics limiting bread was not mean-spirited. We're in this battle together, so it was definitely a thoughtful question. Of course I promptly told him to shush it, because, well ... I like bread.

However, I don't want to imply that I'm careless enough in my diabetes management to disregard sound nutritional advice. Quite the contrary. Tech and I have both gone through diabetes education classes which are very intense and cover a huge range of information. One of those areas is nutrition, of course, and we learn how important it is to control (not eliminate) carbohydrate intake.

I am allowed seven servings of carbohydrates each day. Each serving is equivalent to 15 grams of carbs. Learning what a "serving" is is an ongoing education. I learn to read food labels. Other people may be watching fat intake; I have to watch that AND carbohydrates.

So, no, I don't want to give you the impression that I ate the whole thing last weekend when I made that great loaf of bread. I did not. Granted, I did not treat it with scientific precision when I did eat it. I guesstimated, and I knowingly overdid it, a bit. I enjoyed a splurge.

It would be one thing if I splurged on candy bars. Or potatoes. (Potatoes REALLY can send my blood sugar sky-high faster than candy!) But this was good-quality, whole grain, fresh bread with no preservatives, which I made myself. I did eat it with some moderation. I even have some left, if you can believe it.

OK, so what DOES being diabetic mean in practical terms in my daily life?

The biggest thing is that I test my blood sugar every day. Or nearly every day. There are times when the day is over before I get it done. That's OK. I still keep track of it several days a week, and I try to test at different times so I can see what might cause my numbers to be off track.

Here's what this new health routine looks like. Don't worry, I'll warn you before we get to anything that might make you queasy.

This is my testing kit. It includes my meter, a bottle of testing strips and what I call my "poke 'em stick." Other people call it a lancet. There's also a pocket that holds a log book so I can write my numbers down and study them over time.


Here's the meter. You can see it fits nicely in the palm of my hand.


Here is a test strip. It's some sort of a hard plastic which has a capillary channel through which the blood activates an electric signal. Somehow there's some hocus pocus built into this thing which lets the meter know how much glucose is floating around in my blood. Cool, huh, that a little thing like this can tell us so much.


The test strip goes into the top of the meter, turning the meter on.


Now comes the poke 'em stick -- er, lancet. It is spring loaded -- I draw back the trigger, and when I place it against the heel of my hand, I push the trigger and it launches the lancet. You big burly types that get faint at the notion of b-l-o-o-d may want to put your head between your knees right now and scroll past the next couple of photos.


I use alternate site testing -- what's that? It just means I do not stick my fingers! I'm so lucky to live in a time when finger-sticking is just one option for diabetic testing. I test on the heel of my hand, where there are lots of capillaries, and it does not hurt one bit. I promise you, I hardly feel it. No pain. This is good.



See? It was done in less than a second. Now I have a teeeeeeny tiny drop of blood on my hand, and I take the meter and the test strip to the drop and let the test strip siphon it into the meter. (Actually, the blood stays right in a tiny area of the test strip, probably less than 1/8th of an inch long, where all the electronic wizardry happens.



See? Not bad.

OK, guys, we're through with that. The machine counts down, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 and then it tells me what my blood sugar level is.

LOOK!! It's good tonight. My level is 122, before I eat supper. I like that number.



I really like it because it was "eat like a Barbarian day." I had a huge and nutritionally improper breakfast, but it was cold and I was whiny and we ordered out at the office and I went to pick it up out in the cold.

And then at lunch we had submarine sandwiches. I ate mine without the bread, just snacking on the protein fillers. Plenty of yum, zero carbs.

Here's another component of my health care. I take a diabetes drug called Metformin. One pill, twice a day. It's a $4 prescription at Wal-Mart, for which I am truly grateful.


So there you have it in a nutshell:
1. Count carbs and eat a well-balanced, studied diet.
2. Don't eat the whole loaf of bread, even if you really like it.
3. Test blood sugar daily.
4. Take medication as prescribed.

In addition: Drink lots of water. This is really important for diabetics and is really good advice for everyone who is a human. Get exercise. It helps control the release of glucose into the blood stream. Get plenty of quality sleep. It's good for you and it feels really, really good.

And if you have diabetes, be grateful. It is definitely a manageable disease and you could wind up being healthier for it. Take a good diabetes education class and learn how to manage it and take good care of yourself.

The e-mail meme making the rounds

I'll jump on this bandwagon, too, since it seems to be getting around so quickly.

1. What is your occupation? City government and education reporter. Also domestic diva in my own mind.
2. What color are your socks right now? Oh thank goodness, those ARE socks! They are black. For a second I thought I had gangrene.
3. What are you listening to right now? The pinging of the floor furnace as it cools down.
4. What was the last thing that you ate? A cube of cheddar cheese.
5. Can you drive a stick shift? Oh yeah, baby.
6. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Plaid.
7. Last person you spoke to on the phone? Indirectly, it was the police PIO. I actually had my co-worker call for me because I was closer to her desk than mine. Yeah, lazy.
8. Do you like the person who sent this to you? Yes. Only I had to pick it up off of Tech's blog.
9. How old are you today? 52 years, 10 months.
10. Favorite drink? Diet Coke. Or, as my co-worker calls it, "FAKE SUGAR!"
11. What is your favorite sport to watch? Do I hafta?
12. Have you ever dyed your hair? Oh, yes, yes. But that's all behind me now. I've been the gamut from blonde to burgundy. Now I embrace the gray.
13. Pets? Are nice. Wish I had a doggie.
14. Favorite food? Is there only one favorite? Because I sure seem to like a whole bunch of it.
15. Last movie you watched? Can't remember, it has been so long.
16. Favorite Day of the year? Oct. 15. No reason.
17. What do you do to vent anger? I mouth off a lot. I try to keep it in the shower, but oops, sometimes I slip up and say things at inappropriate moments.
18. What was your favorite toy as a child? My dolly Mary.
19. What is your favorite season? Fall!
20. Hugs or kisses? KISSES!!! (because it's hard to kiss without getting a hug in there too. I like both and will steal if necessary.)
21. Cherry or Blueberry? Cherry.
22. When was the last time you cried? Probably in the past few months, missing my old house and friends.
23. What is on the floor of your closet? Hmm. You know, I'm not sure. I haven't unpacked that stuff in the laundry basket to see what it is.
24. Who is the friend you have had the longest? Juan, since grade school.
25. Favorite smells? Sheesh, can't we narrow this down a little? Puppy breath, a baby's neck, food in the smoker, Picasso Paloma perfume on a hot summer night, Yankee candles on a cold winter night, pot roast cooking with rosemary and thyme....
26. Who inspires you? Mo Anderson, who went from being my grade school music teacher to the CEO of Keller Williams Realty.
27. What are you afraid of? Spending my life lonely.
28. Plain, cheese or spicy hamburgers? Cheeboogie, cheeboogie, cheeboogie, Pepsi.
29. Favorite car? My 1995 Honda Civic, duh. That's why I've kept it so long!
30. Favorite cat breed? Someone else's.
31. Number of keys on your key ring? Dunno, and it's in the other room. Only three that matter any more.
32. How many years at your current job? Let's see, what is 8/12ths - three quarters of a year.
33. Favorite day of the week? Saturdays and Sundays, on weekends when I do not have to work. Working 6-day weeks sucks.
34. How many states have you lived in? 1, unless you count a two-month stint in Manhattan.
35. Do you think you're funny? I'm freakin' hilarious! Trust me on this if you can't tell.

Home-made bread

I tried a new bread recipe this weekend. It was interesting in both ingredients and method -- some new twists and turns I'd not seen or tried before.
This is in the EXTREMELY EASY category. The trick is having enough time to commit to being present with this bread at a few critical moments. I'll do it again, now that I'm a little more familiar with its timing -- but I would consider this a "free weekend" project when you're housebound because of weather or sheer desire.

I'll go through some photos of the steps first, then will share the odd little recipe at the end:

First, all the things we need. Unbleached all-purpose flour; whole wheat flour, instant yeast, salt, water, BEER, vinegar.


Dry ingredients:


Wet ingredients. Mmm. Ingredients.


Stirred together to form a "shaggy ball."


All tucked in for the next 8 to 18 hours.


First rising:


Ready to knead:


Smooth as a baby's bottom:


Preparing a parchment lined skillet for the second rising:


Spraying the top with no-stick spray:


It took another two-hour nap at this point.

Now, I see if it's awake and finished rising the second time. Close enough.


The oven has been heated to 500 degrees, with the dutch oven inside. HOT.


I flour the top of the loaf:


And then cut a 6-inch slit in the top


Using the parchment sling, the loaf now gets popped into the very extremely hot *ouch* dutch oven. The lid is put on top.


Then the heat is turned down to 425 and the loaf bakes, covered, for 30 minutes. Then the lid comes off and it bakes for another 20 to 30 minutes untiil it is dark brown and an instant-read thermometer reads 210. (I'll check to see how it sounds.)

Then it cools for two hours on a wire rack while I run off to play handbells.

When I took the lid off the pot, the parchment had already turned brown. This will be interesting!

The Verdict: The bread is GREAT. Good, crusty, flavorful. Definitely a peasant type bread. Would make a great soup bowl type bread.


Straight out of the oven. Too hot to touch!


Back from bells -- about an hour and a half cooling time on the rack. Cut and ready for butter!

It's soooo good.

The regular bread recipe calls for 3 cups unbleached all-purpose flour. The version I made substitutes 1 cup whole wheat flour for one cup of the unbleached.

I would make this again, now that I've got the hang of the timing. It would have to be on a weekend when I knew I would be home at the key times without being too stressed. Total time to do: 5 minutes for the mixing step. Lots of waiting. 5 minutes for the little bit of kneading before the second rise. 5 minutes to super-heat the oven and dutch oven. 5 minutes to get it ready to bake. An hour of time while it's in the oven.

There are other options in the recipe as well. I like this well enough to forego store bread. I just have to be careful not to devour the whole loaf when it comes out of the oven!

Oh, the traffic!

For a couple of weeks now, I've had a routine of counting the number of cars that cross my path in the morning on my drive to work -- specifically, I count how many cars I have to wait on in order to cross the street at each intersection.

Now, you might want to know that I drive down one street, Chestnut, from Thirteenth to Third (and yes, the formal names of the streets are spelled out here.) The main north-south street along my path is Fifth Street. Seventh Street is the heaviest secondary north-south street.

This morning I didn't have to wait on a single car! Not one! I thought for a minute the cable truck at Fourth Street was going to snag me, but sure enough, he cleared the intersection before I completed my stop at the stop sign.

One morning I hit it at the wrong time on Fifth Street. Cars were piled up everywhere. I had to wait for 10 (yes! Ten!) cars to cross before I could go.

I guess that's the hazard of crossing a four-lane road in the morning in the big town.

Most days the commute takes me two or three minutes. I think it took FOUR MINUTES to get to work that day. What's cool is that I have time to look at the drivers, and most days I know those people crossing my path. I see teachers, librarians, city office workers and others that I talk with regularly.

It's also fun in a voyeuristic sort of way driving through the one historic neighborhood in our town. It's pure coincidence that these are the people I've gotten to know best here. The old houses are charming, especially in the early-morning light. And there's a bit of something incongruent seeing these people leave their stately, well-ordered and preserved homes and rushing off in their SUVs and mom-mobiles. I like that. I like seeing them scurry off to jobs where they have to pretend that they weren't running behind trying to get there.

It's also fun watching the city manager's secretary, a tall, dour woman, walking towards city hall dressed in jeans, a blazer and high-heeled boots with little fur cuffs.

What sort of dichotomous observations have you had about the people you see in the mornings?

Happy Happy Unbirthday to me!

This is weird and funny and slightly strange and kooky....

Someone just had a fancy decorated cake delivered to "Trixie" at my office. There was a nice birthday card and also two small sugar-free cakes included. The bakery delivered it twice because no one here knows who Trixie is.

The cake wishes "Happy 50th UNbirthday, Trixie".

Obviously this is someone who knows me pretty well, if they went to this elaborate length. First, it has to be someone who knows I use the name Trixie online, who knows I am diabetic, probably someone who knows my real birthday is April Fool's day and is pulling a prank. And someone who likes me well enough to go to the trouble!

Whoever it is, they have me smiling all day!

Shy Longhorn

This guy will never make it to Detroit to introduce a new truck like the longhorns featured on Erudite Redneck's blog.

He's just a little too shy.

Cheating Death Left and Right

Earlier this week my guardian angel managed to keep me from getting bashed in the face by a skateboard. Yay guardian angel!

Today I had a followup visit with my doctor about my diabetes. I was diagnosed in September and my blood sugar numbers were astronomical: Fasting blood sugar was 270 and my A1C, which is a measure of blood sugar over a three-month period, was 10.8. At the time I saw her in October when she gave me these results, she told me the scale only went to 11. In my classes, I think they said the scale went to 13. In any event, 10.8 is like, right up there in the deadly range. You never, ever want to be told you have a 10.8 A1C score.

And just for grins, my cholesterol was 268, HDL was 49, LDL was 189, triglycerides were 151. I also had some wacked-out liver enzyme numbers.

Doctor had told me that I needed to get serious because "death is grabbing for you, girl." We started aggressive therapies and I took a series of diabetes education classes. I swore off sweets and radically monitored all my carbohydrate intake. I started some power walking on my lunch hour and some other things. I did what I had to do.

And today, I got the TA-DA Gold Star Award (well, she said I deserved a gold star. She really didn't give me one, but wouldn't that have been cool?)

Forgive me, but I don't have the sheet in front of me with all the numbers. I was busy showing it off at work and left it there this afternoon. I'll tell you what I know for sure.

Fasting blood sugar dropped from 270 to 170. Yay me!
My A1C level dropped from 10.8 to 7.0!!!! YAYAYAYAYA ME! (Normal is about 6. I'm almost normal!!! I'm certainly in a good range for someone with diabetes.)
Cholesterol dropped to 184. YES. Rarely in my life have I gotten it below 200. This is amazing. Good cholesterol is up. Bad is down. Triglycerides are down. All are in a very good range right now. YAY me!

Blood pressure? Oh, you want to know about my blood pressure too? Well, lissen up my friends! I had a blood pressure of 222/121. Yes, I did. How I didn't have a stroke - I can only credit my guardian angel and good luck for that.

TODAY my blood pressure was 124/68.

I can live with that. Thanks, Doc.

YAY ME!

To Anyone Who Has Loved a Dog

Recommended Reading:

Good Dog. Stay by Anna Quindlen (Random House; 1 edition November 20, 2007)

This is a quick little read that will fill up the heart of any dog lover and just as quickly drive them to tears. I stopped by the library on my lunch hour to return some books and picked this up just to have something to read across the street as I ate lunch.

More than half the book is photographs of all kinds of loving dogs. Most made me smile; several made me laugh out loud, which surprised me. It also surprised me to find myself weeping over the words as I ate my pulled-pork sandwich.

Anyone who has lived through a dog's life cycle with them will know the struggle Quindlen describes about making decisions for their loved pet. And anyone who has done that will know about the tears.

Just a side note: I finished the book and my sandwich about the same time and was able to return it to the library before heading back to the office. Take an hour for yourself and give this one a look. You'll be glad you did.

A close call this evening

My town just built a cool skate park for the skateboarders and others who like alternative sports. It's a project I have supported and am very proud of.

The ribbon-cutting was this evening and I was there to take pictures of the first official day of the park. It was a BLAST. If I had been able to swipe a skateboard from one of the kids, I would have. I swear I will be skating there before I die, somehow.

Anyway, I was taking shots from all over the park. These preadolescent boys were all coming up and calling me "picture lady" or "newspaper woman". It was so sweet, really. They are good kids and I'm thrilled they have a place for this park in the old neighborhood where I grew up.

There was another lady who was over in one corner of the pad trying out a Razr scooter and the city manager asked me to go get a photo of her.

I sent one of the boys over to her to tell her to come towards me. She said no. I told the boy to tell her G.M. sent me. She laughed, but still said no. She was just learning.

So I'm standing next to the side of one of the half pipes and I bent over to set my pen on top of my camera bag, and just as I started to straighten up, I saw a flash of red out of the corner of my eye and felt something brush the top of my hair. I was thinking "Boy, I hope that wasn't a bird pooping on me."

Well, it wasn't a bird pooping on me. It was a loose skateboard that one of the kids lost control of at the other side of the half-pipe that came flying straight at me. If I had been standing fully upright, it would have smashed full force into my face.

All these new young friends of mine were shocked and stunned into silence at the top of the ramp. When they could finally breathe again, the kid who lost the board was nearly crying when he said "I am SO GLAD you are OK!"

Me too!

The Many Moods of Me

The EVIL Distraction!

Here's another challenge for you all. Name the thing that recently has started sucking up all your time.

For me, it's easy. It's an insane game called Sudoku, which seems deceptively easy. All you have to do is fit the numbers 1 through 9 into little boxes.

The catch is that each digit appears only once in each row, column or 9-box group. There are 9 nine-box groups in the puzzle.

Oh, sure, they lure you in with the easy ones, where all you have to do, basically, is count the numbers in the boxes and fill in the obvious blanks! That makes you feel like a genius.

And then...

Before you know it ...

You're hooked!

You may find yourself stealing off to the break room with the newspaper and a pen -- it has the same sort of academic thrill that working the New York Times crossword puzzle in ink has.

Starting on Monday, many newspapers suck readers in with the "easy" level puzzles. And many don't realize that it progresses to "intermediate," "advanced" and "F@*@#% HARD!"

Sometimes you'll do a Google search and find the online "Web Sudoku" site. You can select the level of difficulty you'd like. I still maintain, however, that the site has a cookie which remembers which puzzles you've worked and surreptitiously jacks up the difficulty. Kind of like boiling a frog in a pot of water -- just turn up the heat a notch at a time and he'll never notice until it's too late.

Yeah. Just call me Kermit. Well done.

Tag!

It's time for a little post-Christmas game of tag! We haven't done a good meme or tag for a while and things are dull, dull, dull in much of blogdom right now. I know it is here!

So here, in an effort to liven things up a bit:

Rules
1. Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog.
2. Share 5 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.
3. Tag 5 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
4. Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

Here are my Five Facts:

1. It seems I can only keep one room in my house clean at one time. Currently it is my bedroom. It is spotless. However, no one could sit in my living room (again) if they dropped by. I feel like a failure.

2. I anticipate another major upheaval in my life in the coming year, probably in an effort to relocate to a larger city. I am giving this a lot of thought (e.g., obsessing). I want to consider all my options carefully.

3. There are several things I have not done since I've been in this town: Knit, cook dinner for friends, watch TV. The absence of these things has been disturbing in subtle ways.

4. I bought a front-loading washing machine and matching dryer when I moved into my house five months ago. It's not all that. I miss the simple Kenmore washer & dryer my mom bought me when I moved to my old house 11 years ago and secretly wish I had moved them.

5. I would love to set up a sewing studio if I could make room for one, somehow. I have three sewing machines that I haven't had a chance to use in a long time -- one is new and I've never used it.


The Five Suspects:

1. Tech at 51313 Harbor Street
2. Junior the Bear at Junior the Bear: At Large in the World
3. Frenzied at Life Happens When You're Planning Something Else
4. Jeannie Diane at Where the Heck is 10Buck2?
5. E.R. at Erudite Redneck

While y'all are at it, throw in a bonus answer and tell me why you named your blogs what you named them!

Merry Christmas, one and all!

I've got snow (for a little while, until the sun does its work); I have presents to open and lots of food in the fridge, including a ham, several pears from Harry & David, and a dozen or so oranges I bought to support the local high school band.

Last night I attended the 8 p.m. Christmas Eve communion service at my church. There was lots of beautiful music, the story from Luke and a packed house. It is nice to see every pew filled up to the point of people moving up to the balcony. A couple of weeks ago there were more people in the choir than in the congregation because of the weather. Not so last night!

This evening I may (MAY) go over to some new friends' house where a few people will congregate for supper. Until then I am going to enjoy a blessed day at home, reading, napping, opening gifts and perhaps writing out some belated Christmas cards... I'm just no good at that kind of thing, it seems, but I'm sure I have other nice qualities of some sort.

Wherever you are, and however you are spending this holy day, may God keep you firmly in the palm of His hand, today and throughout the coming new year.

Thanks for dropping by! Ho ho ho!

The snow is back

And it's here with a vengeance! We're in the midst of a blizzard with white-out conditions. Silly me -- yesterday when it was in the 40s I left the office and forgot my coat. I had to run back to get it today during the snowstorm.

While I was out I was foolish enough to decide I was really hungry. So I treated myself to lunch at the Chinese buffet. I was thinking "who would do this in a blizzard?" Apparently I was not alone in my cravings because the place was full. I nearly started giggling inappropriately as I sat there eating next to a Mexican family speaking Spanish. Just seemed so odd that in a snow storm there would be Mexican people eating Chinese food. No, I know that may not be as funny to anyone else as it was to me, so never you mind. Just walk on by.

I'd take photos if I could, but my windows are covered with the windblown snow, so no can do from the warmth of my home. Might make a good macro shot... maybe later. I'm not in the mood.

The only item I'm missing right now is some Diet Coke. Otherwise I'm stocked well enough to stay holed up again this weekend. At this rate I won't be going to church tomorrow, either. Two weeks in a row is too long, but I'm not going back out in this.

Again I am glad to have a floor furnace so I can warm myself with direct heat when I need to thaw.

I have plenty of books to keep me company for as long as this isolation lasts, plus DVDs if I get around to hooking up the DVD player to the TV. Otherwise there will be no TV either since I STILL have not gotten cable.

I have to tell you though, that one of my favorite bloggers, Pioneer Woman, was featured today on CNN Headline News' program "News to Me." I couldn't watch it on TV, obviously, but there is a YouTube clip. Just type in "Pioneer Woman" in the keyword search and it will take you HERE, to the CNN HN clip It will make you laugh. GO WATCH IT!

Things I am liking tonight

1. The choral society concert is over. It started at 7 tonight and I was in my car at 7:55. Half the concert was two Bach pieces in German and several pieces from Handel's "Messiah." The other half was Christmas carols we sang from the audience, with the audience. We've worked on this performance since August, every single week. And it's over.

2. By 8:15 I had been served in my favorite neighborhood restaurant. Others from the group wandered in after I was seated, and I declined invitations to sit with them because I just wanted to eat quickly and get home.

3. I was home by 9 p.m. and already opened the mail.

4. Nothing is stopping me from going to bed early tonight. I should be on my way to Slumberland in about 10 minutes.

5. Snow's in the forecast again this weekend. And I don't have to work on Saturday. Yay!

6. I have been invited to play the piano for Sunday morning's gathering music at church, but there's no pressure if I decide not to do it. So if it snows, and I decide I can't drive the 7 blocks to church, no pressure. I'd like to play, actually, but I'd also like to be rehearsed, and I can't do that to my satisfaction without a piano. I'll let you know how it goes.

7. Tomorrow's Friday! Yay! This week is almost in the can. It has not been in the Top 10 list of great weeks.

8. I like that the library has a drive-up drop-off. I also like that my library system doesn't charge fines for overdue books. I just dropped one off after I had dinner tonight that was due back 11/26/07. I'm a little s-l-o-w.

9. I like that a calendar I ordered on the 17th arrived in today's mail. That's good!

10. I like that I have my bedroom cleaned up and I've kept it tidy for three days now. I even splurged and bought myself new pillows the other day. Yay!

11. I like that I've lost two more pounds this week, almost without effort. And I've dropped another size in pants. I do like that, yes, I do. Even if it's still my little secret.

12. I got flowers at work this week. I really liked that!

13. 2007 is almost over. I'm pretty thrilled about that. I need another chance to sweep the slate clean. I think most of us like that and need to get a clean sweep now and then. Plus I have this new calendar that I can't wait to use.

14. I like that I have friends that I miss so very, very much in my old city. Even though I sometimes come to the point of crying because I miss them, it just shows me how great it is to have people I care about that much. I hope I get to see them all again soon. I wish I could round up everyone I've ever loved and cared about and have a big old party. There would be quite a crowd. I might even dance. You've been warned.

Snowy Saturday

Proof of life in a small town

You know you live in a small town when you go stand on the main street, in the dark, in freezing rain, unable to feel your fingers, unable to get the sleet off your lens, and still manage to get a photo of the city garbage truck in the Christmas parade, decked out with Christmas lights.
And you go out on the street, right along with the kids, to pick up the candy thrown by people on the floats.
That, my friends, is what makes America great!

Mi-ser-eeeee!

The weather is fierce here. I had forgotten how much difference 100 miles and a smaller city can make when it comes to weather.
For the past *mumblemumble30yearsmumblemumble* I've lived in the large metropolis in the center of my state. This is my first taste of cold weather since I've moved back "home" up north. The hometown is just a drop in the proverbial bucket in size.
I'm fully convinced that the metropolis absorbs and holds much more heat. It also acts as a wind break, what with all those buildings and cars. Up here we're surrounded on all sides by open prairie with nary a building over four stories tall, I'd guess. And that's pushing it.
Somehow 49 degrees here is much colder than 30 degrees in the big city. I don't understand all the physics involved in the theory of "small town weather anomalies" but I'm sure there is some such scientific study out there.
This blasted cold weather has ruined my plans for the weekend. I was going to head to the big city tonight after work and stay with my best friends and then go to a "new life party" in the Bricktown area tomorrow evening for a newly divorced male friend. Our circle of friends has supported him through a two-year struggle to resolve the issues with his ex and work out details of the child custody arrangement and the like. He NEEDS this party and we needed to cheer him into the next chapter of his life's story.
It's annoying when icy weather puts the brakes on that kind of landmark.
So... it looks like I'll mosey down a couple of blocks after work to the hometown lighted holiday parade, stand in the cold until I cry and watch the nighttime WITH lights version of the other four parades I've seen since I've been back.
Oh! Oh!! The big news is that SANTA will be in this parade! I can't wait!! He'll be all the way at the end of the parade after the mayor, the city commissioners and the city manager go by.
One thing that never changes -- the city is still using the very same Santa house that they had when I was a kid. Right now it is parked at the end of the parade route in front of the public library across the street from City Hall.
I have to go down that way this afternoon. I wonder if he'll take early appointments.

Two Weeks Until Our Concert

Off the top of my head I cannot recall what, if anything, I have told you about the com-
munity choir I belong to. I joined it in August, and since that time (what is that, four months now?) we have been working on Handel'sMessiah and a couple of short Bach pieces. We will perform in two weeks at this theater. There will also be a community Christmas carol sing-along and we will have a six-piece professional orchestra playing with us. Will Rogers performed at this theater. Ethyl Barrymore performed here as well. It was built in 1928 and is on the National Register of Historic Places.

Alas, I have decided to forego my experience of singing at Carnegie Hall in January. Since I was diagnosed with diabetes I have had a series of unexpected expenses which have cut my budget to the thin side, too squeaky close for my comfort. In case I didn't explain that opportunity fully, I was invited to sing at Carnegie Hall as part of a mass choir made up of people from across the country. We were to sing a mass for peace on Martin Luther King's birthday.

I just got the music about a week ago. The full score is about 100 pages. That was a lot of music to learn in a very short time -- just over a month -- on top of what we've already spent months learning for this local concert.

I am sad at passing up this opportunity, but the practical side of me knows I have made the correct decision for now. Other opportunities will present themselves in the future. What makes me saddest is that one of my lifelong friends and her daughter, both from the Austin area in Texas, were going to meet me in New York to come to the performance and we were going to share a room and hang out in our free time. However, we can make plans to do something similar for a lot less money at a time when we won't be sloshing snow in our shoes.

It would have been great, though!

Torn

What I want to be doing: I want to be knitting -- comforting prayer shawls, little sweaters for children, lacy patterns for the art of it.
What I'm really doing: Looking for: My knitting needles; a project I started in June; a place to store my yarn stash.
What I want to be doing: Cooking dinner for a family, urging my teens to eat their salad and veggies, planning healthy menus to keep their energy up.
What I'm really doing: Eating alone, checking my blood sugar every day, trying to keep a watch on the number of carbs I eat, making sure I take my diabetes medication and trying to get in a walk every day.
What I want to be doing: Running kids around to piano lessons, recitals and choir rehearsals for Christmas plays.
What I'm really doing: Spending the day with a group of 120 high school students, learning about the realities of their lives, the sexual abuse by family members, the torture visited upon classmates, the addictions and neglect in their families, the pressures they feel to use drugs and alcohol, the obsessions with cutting and burning themselves to escape the very real pain of not being noticed or believed.