I had a rather sleepless night because of sounds I heard outside my window. The final conclusion on my part is that the noises were caused by the wind, but they sure sounded like an assortment of other things: Cats doing the "dance of love;" electric toy trains, complete with the "woo, woo" whistle and the sound of the wheels on the snap-together track; mooing cows; and I would swear there was a bobcat in the mix. Not a single dang one of them was real. I heard them all through the night, to the point of waking up and wondering if I should go look outside. I voted no, until about sunrise, when I finally threw on my jeans and coat to see if there was an animal in distress or a circus set up outside my bedroom.
Nada. Not one single thing that I could pin the sounds on.
So, lacking the sleep I needed, I opted not to try to be presentable for church and instead decided to have some private devotional time at home, and focus in on some things which have been weighing me down in powerful ways.
Now that it's just after 10 p.m., I can report that it has been a successful day, with goals identified and steps taken to meet those goals. There remains some labor to perform, but now I have a clear course before me.
I also have a mostly clear floor around me, which was one of the huge issues with which I was struggling. In fact I was able to clear up piles and stacks of books, dishes, assorted mountains of paper and other stuff to the point where I could vacuum the dining room rug.
I also moved my computer off of the dining table. This is HUGE in ways I can only hope to explain. This has been a spirit-crushing intrusion on what I want for my life -- part of the way I define myself. That computer on the table has been a fortress which kept others at bay. If the table is covered, I can't invite others to dinner here. I cannot practice hospitality.
Now, the computer is on another table along the wall in the dining room. And guess what -- where I have it now, I don't have all the accompanying cords trailing all over, wrapping around me and choking the life out of me. That was another benefit that was nearly a surprise to me as I hadn't really thought about that part of it.
There is a divided shelf between my dining room and kitchen. Over the past couple of days I have cleaned it and organized some of my favorite objects on it. There are 16 separate boxes or windows on this shelving unit and 12 of them are pretty, now. My things are safely off the floor. Other dishes have been washed and stacked in the cabinet below.
I've been going through piles of papers, sorting out things that need to be shredded and separating out the papers that can just be recycled or thrown out. The purge is GOOD.
There's a certain energy that has returned to me. I've missed it and am glad to have it back.
No, I'm not finished with this work, but it's just great to see some progress being made.
Time to hit the hay so I can be ready to work tomorrow. I hope your new year is giving you the opportunity to make some personal commitments, too.